Time for a change

I have been majorly MIA when it comes to my poor blog. There is no good reason other than I have been busy... trying to live in the moment, but failing miserably. I have made a few major decisions, however. Katelyn and I are going to make a big move. For me, it is moving back home, for Katelyn it will be moving closer to daddy - to Ohio. It has been so difficult to be so far away from family and to not have very many close friends. My friends here for the most part are happily married and have children and I work so much that it is difficult to find time to hang out.

I have sent in my application for an Ohio license and am waiting to hear more. I am praying that it is not as challenging as getting my Florida license, which was so stressful. I have been on one interview for a great job, just not the best job for me. I have three more interviews set for the first week in July and am hoping that one of them is a good fit. And then I will have to find a place to live. I continue to pray that this house will sell. I am trying to keep faith. I don't want to think about what my life will be like financially if it does not sell. At $96/ sq ft you would think someone would buy it.

Currently I am missing my baby girl. She has been gone for nearly two weeks - last week she was with my mom and this week she is with her daddy. I miss her like crazy, but I know it is good for both of us. I just wish I had more quality time to spend with her. I am hoping that the job I take will allow me much more time with Katelyn. I would love one day off per week to go do stuff - go to the zoo, museum, park, on playdates and anywhere else we feel like going.

I knew it was time to move on when I found myself thinking that I resented my job because it took me away from my child. And I love being a pediatrician. I love my patients. I hate being on call every other week and some of the parents are a giant pain. Some of them take advantage of our call system to avoid coming in during the week so they can be seen on the weekend or expect you to call in antibiotics over the phone w/o having to come in for an appointment. I don't think a person would have to go to medical school for 4 years and residency for 3 years if being a parent automatically gave you the ability to diagnose every illness or you could know everything about pediatrics because you read it on the internet. On the other hand, I feel like I am not being the best mom because I always have other things to do and cannot spend as much quality time as I would like. I am forever exhausted.

The tough part is going to be breaking it to the boss. She is going to kill me. I feel really bad, but I know that it is the best thing for me and Katelyn to move back to Ohio. It will allow her more time with her father, who at this point has spent about 45 days with her since he moved back to Ohio last April. Moving closer will allow him to see her more w/o the large cost of flying. Yet, I struggle a little because I hate being away from her.

Now that I have written a book, I will end with a promise that I will try to be better at blogging.